


Personal Diary

by nanu_hammies



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:07:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27027064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanu_hammies/pseuds/nanu_hammies
Summary: This isn't a fanfic or anything. I always find it therapeutic to write out my emotions and I want to see if there's anyone else out there like me.
Kudos: 2





	Personal Diary

Hey y'all, this is Nanu.  
I know that this is probably weird to read because it isn't a fanfic but I just wanted to talk. Not to anyone in particular but just let my voice out for anyone who wants to hear.

I'm 18 and living in California. I got a pretty okay life, considering what's going on right now. I don't really have to worry about food, I have clothes and I have luxury of being able to write this on a laptop (one my school rented out to me that came with wifi but that's besides the point). I have a pretty average household too. My mom, my biological dad, and my two sisters; one older and one younger.

My mom is one of the hardest working people I know. She works at a hospital as a janitor but she's slowly moving up the ranks to becoming a nurses assisstant. So thankfully a little more money will come in. I've been trying to find a job but I just keep getting rejected. I know I should "keep my spirits up" but's annoying to get rejection email after rejection email.

My biological dad Angel on the other side; I wish he were dead. I know, I know. "Never wish death on anyone." or "He's your 'dad'." but if y'all knew him like I did, y'all would be surprised I haven't killed him yet. Not only is he an alcoholic he's also a druggie. His choice is cocaine and beer. He's wasted so much money on his fixes instead of actually trying to help the family. He's also verbally abusive. 

The best example of that was when I was in forth grade. I've always struggled in social situation and couldn't tell when people were fishing for compliments. I would often just say exactly how I felt instead of thinking of the consequences. I was in band and was practicing for the spring concert. I guess I was playing too loud because Angel stormed into my room. I didn't know he was mad so I was just confused. He kept complaining how I was being too loud and how it didn't even sound good. Me, being a literal child and struggling with talking, I told him no. He literally grabbed my bell kit from my lap, threw it across the room and got real close to my face.

"You will never go anywhere. You might as well end it here."

I guess since I started crying, he got annoyed and left. I swear, that encounter changed me. At first, I was just completely depressed. I didn't want to go to school, I refused to eat more than to barely scrap by and didn't do anything unless completely necessary. I don't know when it happened but then I just thought "You know what? Screw him. I'm gonna do good JUST to spite him."

And that's where life began. I began studying harder, being more social and I even was part of four different clubs in high school; being president of two of them.

Since I probably talked your ear off, I'll let y'all go. When something major happens or when I feel like venting again, I'll be here again.


End file.
